I DONT GET IT
A SCREENPLAY BY
ROBERT L. ANGUS
(c) 2022, All rights reserved.
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EXT. DAY. (MUSIC: Latino Rap, in Spanish. MAKING LIGHT OF AN ORDINARY DARKNESS)
Overhead drone shot of East Los Angeles. The Smog is thick. Traffic is Busy.
Shots continue with ordinary people going about their day. Driving. Shopping. Walking their dogs.
Shots of police ignoring crimes happening right in front of them.
Shots of homeless people's tents being demolished by city employees.
Shots of skaters and ordinary folk hanging out on a busy retail area (EAST LA).
Shots of friends meeting up. Jovial. Loving. Shoulder Bumps.
Shots of enemies eying each other from across the street, but keeping to their own.
Camera FOLLOWS (EXT/INT/EXT):
BOB (An ordinary looking guy, nothing stands out about him. Plain casual clothing. Plain haircut. Obviously BROWN, not latino, but BROWN.)BOB walking across the street, waves at a random person, who waves back and smiles. Bob is a nice guy from the neighborhood. He's plain, peaceful, ordinary. BOB enters a LATINO groceria. He's NOT Latino, but the people there welcome him, they know him, they treat him like he's okay. He approaches a grocer dressed in a green apron, stocking shelves, and chats him up. They laugh, and he goes on to the cashier, who smiles, and finds him a coupon to save him a few cents. He's grateful and smiling. Fist Bumps, and back out to the parking lot, sees someone he knows, shakes hands, and carries on down the sidewalk. Bob is happy go lucky. He's an okay guy, and treats everyone around him with respect and and air of friendship.
BOB enters a small nondescript office building, no signage, but obviously a small business place with a few offices in it. Stucco or Brick. Main street. Lots of foot traffic.
BOB opens an office door, the sign beside the door reads "DR. RUDY STEIN". He signs his name with the receptionist and sits down in the waiting room. There are a few ordinary looking people there, a mother with a toddler in a stroller, an old man, picking at his belly button and reading a very out dated ladies fashion magazine, and a chubby young man who is too interested in his cell phone to bother looking up. His leg is shaking, like he's bored as hell and can't wait for thing to get over and done with. BOB chooses a seat equidistant from everyone else, makes BABY-NOISES at the baby, who gives him a smile, and BOB grabs a magazine off of a nearby end table and flips through it, engaged, but not particularly interested.
RECEPTIONIST calls for the old man. Then the boy. Then the mother. A few other people come and go. BOB is finally called. He's flipped through a few pages. He dog-ears the magazine page, and tucks it into his shoulder-bag.
BOB walks down the hallway and into a small office. Non descript, a desk, chairs, window, bookcase. It doesn't look like anyone's personal office, just a kind of meeting room with a plastic cactus on the shelf, and a few readers digest condensed books to make it look comfortable.
BOB waits a few more minutes, pulling out the magazine and reading a few more pages before the DOCTOR enters the room, sheepish, tired looking, but otherwise cognizant that this is another ordinary boring day.
BOB: Heya, Doc. How're things?
DOCTOR (SITTING ACROSS FROM BOB, READING NOTES FROM A FOLDER, COUGHS DISTRACTEDLY): Bob. Taking your meds as perscribed? Any episodes? Side effects?
BOB: No, Doc. All Good. Can't afford the meds. Just been meditating and hitting up the gymn. You know. Pumpin' some and getting my SWOL on.(GRINS, CHUCKLES, MAKES MUSCLE POSES. IT'S A JOKE ... BOB IS OBVIOUSLY NOT A BODYBUILDER.)
DOCTOR (NOT IMPRESSED, STRAIGHT FACE, NO EMOTION) You need to be taking your meds, Bawb (Drawls, bored, condescending) It's court ordered. If I report that you haven't been ...
BOB (Interrupts DOCTOR) I'm just teasing you, Doc. Of course I've been taking my meds. As perscribed. I've got a little carrying case and everything. See? (PULLS OUT A PLASTIC PILL PLANNER). Besides, it's paid for by Big Brother. Still, they kinda hurt when I stick them up there (GESTURES UPWARDS WITH TWO FINGERS, SUGGESTING THAT THE PILLS ARE ANAL SUPPOSITORIES) Bloop!
DOCTOR: Gooooood ... he ignores BOB, looking back at the sheet, making a note.)Sooooo, anything to report? Any incidents? Anything ... um ... unusual?
BOB: Nothing tooooo weird (Rolls his eyes). I made a new friend. Down the road from my Dad's old motorcyle shop. She's pretty. Putting herself through acting school selling columbian primo. You know, life. She wants babies and lots of them. I can tell. She'll be an actress soon. I need a sugar mama. I can be a stay at home dad and raise a quintet of little Bobs. We'll name them Berto, Bobert, Billy-Bob, Robby Bobby, and Bobby Robby.
THE DOCTOR STOPS, LOOKS AT BOB OVER THE RIMS OF HIS GLASSES, AND REALIZES THAT BOB IS PULLING HIS LEG. (Harrumphs) Robert, I want you to realize that what you report to me is STRICTLY NOT off the record. I need you to be candid and honest with me. The meds are court ordered, and anything that you report to me has to be written down for your next court appearance. You understand that, riiiight? Your FREEDOM could hang in the balance of what I write here in this little file.
BOB (STRAIGHT FACED AND STILL KIND OF A TROUBLE MAKER) Honest, Doc. I've been good. Meds are good. Drug dealer is pretty, but good. And I'm meditating and hitting up the gymn at the Y, just for something to do. Work keeps me busy, and I am keeping out of trouble. Kay? Honest. New girl is gonna be a actress. Might even say yes to a date if I get up to ten stamps on my customer rewards card (Pulls out a nearly full stamped coffee shop card and waves it at the DOCTOR).
DOCTOR (SIGHS, CROSSES OFF A NOTE IN THE FOLDER THAT READS "COCAINE"): I honestly don't know what to do with you, Bobby. You're a joker, alright. Look, are you taking the meds, or not? (TRIES TO GAGE BOB'S REACTION)
BOB: Yeah, man, I'm good. Promise. No episodes. Nothing weird. Except the usual. You know. (CONSPIRATORIAL HUSH, HIDING HIS MOUTH WITH HIS HAND) THEY MIGHT BE LISTENING, DOC ... YOU KNOW, RIGHT? (Laughs) Honestly, Doc. It's all okay. Nothing out of the ordinary. No secrets. And I'm not paranoid or questioning my reality or beliefs, only the usual philosophical exploration of existential dread.
DOCTOR (GLANCES AT HIS WATCH, SIGHS, PASSES BOB A PRESCRIPTION, GLANCES OUT THE WINDOW AT THE BRICK WALL ACROSS THE ALLEY, AND SIGHS AGAIN) I've got some homework for you, Bob.